The TARDIS Book: THE TIME IS NOW (Part 2)
by annabel.lee220
Summary: Book Two: TO BE LIBERATED. In the industrial planet of Ooo, the oppressed citizens live in The Icing Era, under the tyranny of Ice King, a tragic genius whose money can't buy him a single friend. Enjoy the cheesiness. Crossover AU.
1. Chapter 5: Blue

The TARDIS Book: THE TIME IS NOW (Part 5)

Book Two: TO BE LIBERATED

Chapter 5: Blue

* * *

"I'm... Jane. Jane Smith. Don't panic! I'm your friend, from a different time." Jane? He looked at her up and down to see if he could recognize anything about her. Her hair wasn't familiar. It was short like a boy's. Admittedly it did not detract from her fair looks. Her clothes were peculiar, but didn't ring any bells. The only thing that really might have snagged his memory in the faintest way was her very pink skin.  
"This won't make any sense to you, but I want you to open the drawer to your left."  
Finn opened the top drawer of the short dresser next to his bed. He took out a flashlight. Finn looked at it, not knowing what she wanted from him.  
"It's my spare. If you remember who I am, despite the amnesia- press the button. I'll get the signal on my main flashlight and come back around."  
"You sound like you're talking nonsense. How am I supposed to remember you when I'm unconscious a majority of the day?" She frowned. "I understand that you're frustrated. Even if you don't remember anything, please remember to use it if you need any help." She smirked. She got up and walked out of the room. He noticed his heart stop for a beat. It must have started beating a little faster than usual when she was in the room. Then everything faded to black.

He shot up in his bed. His eyes were open now. He started panicking. Jake's groggy body came down from his drawer-bed to his bedside and began gradual counting, almost in a slow chant, "One baby sheep, two baby sheep..." After his breathing slowed down, Jake rubbed his eye bags and went back to sleep. Beside Finn, on top of the short dresser was a glass full of water. He took a gulp. Besides feeling uncomfortable, he felt surprise. A reaction he hadn't really felt since he started dreaming a lot. Even in his dreams, he felt almost nothing. Only at the end of his dreams was when his emotional reaction would kick in. According to Jake though, he was technically improving. His "miniature-comas" only lasted eighteen hours now. And whenever he woke up when Jake's home, the huggles seemed less uncomfortable. He could read his face better than before. He slowly drifted back into a slumber.

* * *

Yesterday Finn told Jake that he had another dream about that awful pink woman. He says it's probably a different alien, but come on, how many pink humanoid aliens in Ooo could there be? Wake up, ya daygleamer! Metaphorically and literally! It's been a year of struggle, part of it was alternating between Jake working his caboose off at the clock factory, and the other part of it is coming home to Finn, unconscious or awake. Jake sometimes wanted to cried, but he had to be strong for the both of them. He had to remind himself that the worst part was over. Their parents were gone, but they left their love with Finn and him. He knew the feels being drained out of Finn would be completely different from any other challenge he had ever dealt with before. But he knew that showing him how much he cared about him would bring him back to who he used to be. Finn knew how to be there for Jake when their parents died, so now it was time for him to return the favor. Jake punched in his slip and left the factory for the day. He bowed his head to Lir Deenable Finkelsteen, a jellyjam with six-tentacles that had taken over Mr. Pig's position, who in return, tipped her hat to him. The upside about Mr. Pig's disappearance was that Jake was promoted and didn't have to work as many hours as before. Finn slept eighteen hours a day, like a newborn. They made a deal that Finn would call in whenever he woke up. He called two hours ago, so he may still be conscious.

Finn was annoyed that they were making the deal, but probably because Jake used the word "newborn". At least he was going through some feels. It looked like he gained some of the light back in his eyes. His huggles were warmer than before. Sometimes they went out for walks. Jake had given up going to the greenlands, in hope of triggering Finn's memory. Why bring up such painful memories? Jake knew they were painful because Finn's heart would pound really fast and he would lose control of his breathing, to the point where Jake would have to carry him out of there, sprinting. Reminding him of what happened might literally kill him. Jake walked down the road, headed for the treehouse. Their parents were lucky that they found the place obscure and abandoned, especially since owning property would either be unaffordable or had to be inherited by a native of Ooo.

"Ow!" Is it hailing? It wasn't, yet a piece of ice had hit Jake in the back of his head. He turned around only to see a bird, unlike any kind he's seen before.

"Weh!" cried the bird. What the flip? He felt a shock surround him and he froze. He couldn't yell or make any sound. The only things he could still move were his eyeballs. Slightly. He was frozen in ice. A man with blue skin and a long, white beard approached him. Judging by the posters in the quarters of the factory, it was the Ice King. The ruler of Ooo.

"Oh what fun this will be! Gunters, put him in the freezer in the back. Enjoy the ride," he grinned. He snapped his fingers and more of the Gunters popped out. They stacked their bodies on top of each other, forming the shape of a giant blob with limbs. They collectively lifted the stone in which Jake was frozen in and took him to the outside of an automobile. The Gunters opened the lid of a large compartment in the back of it and a cloud of air puffed up, frosting and obscuring his view for a moment. They used their collective paw to swipe it away, though there was no point to that. The inside of the compartment looked like it was covered in frost. The Gunters lifted him into the ice box and closed the lid, leaving him in starkness.

* * *

The phone rang."Hello?"

"Yes, who might this be calling?"

"Come now, Lir Deenable. You know who this be."

"Finn the Human, what doth thou wanteth?" she grumbled.

"I need to speak to Jake."

"Well so do I. He didn't come in to work this morning and he still hasn't shown up. Are you sure he's not with you?" Lir asked in a very lir tone.

"No, don't you think I would have checked before asking you? Glob, are you sure he isn't there with you and YOU aren't sure," Finn retorted. He rolled his eyes. What a dense jellyjam.

"Look if you can find Jake, then you can talk to him yourself, otherwise, don't call anymore." Finn heard the click of the phone after she said that.

"Fwibbity fwahp, where the flip is he?" he mumbled under his breath in frustration.

He started gasping. It was getting harder to wake up without Jake around. Luckily, Jake had found an interesting feature on BMO a week ago which allowed him to capture his voice. All Finn had to do was press in the numbers: fifty-one, fifty. Jake left a message that always helped calm Finn by slowing his breathing. Finn still very much preferred if Jake did it in person, because he was getting sick of replaying the same message over and over again. Maybe he could make it without needing to use it for a while.

Finn's heart was still racing. How long has it been since he was on the phone? Finn looked at the clock. A minute. "Fifty-one, fifty," he said aloud as he redialed. Finn began the breathing ritual instructed by Jake's message. Finn tried to clear his mind before letting it return to the pressing issue.

He knew it was going to be difficult finding someone who could help him. If it were a pie that needed baking, he would call Ms. Tree Trunks. If someone needed to be yelled at, he would call Lir Deenable Finkelsteen. If he wanted someone to panic, he would call himself. But who would solve this? Finn decided to call the highest authority he knew.

* * *

"Gunter, is the dog awake?"

"Weh."

"Good," Ice King replied. He walked up to the block of ice he had trapped the canine in, studying him. Aged thirty years, but magical years, so he's not even close to his prime yet. The stark market would take him for approximately *50,347.352 in gold. But maybe he wouldn't be so quick to leave. Maybe he would have fun with the him in the Ice Kingdom. If he chose to stay, he could quit his job at the factory and be this man's best friend. Ice King fantasized about spending the rest of his days with Jake, and a thought-bubble hovered over his head: Him throwing a plastic disc into the air as it spins into the distance. Jake would stretch himself 38.832 times as big just in time to catch it, at a rate of 102.76322 glips per hour, with his hands, of course. "Of course, catching discs with one's mouth is demeaning," Ice King said, thinking out loud.

"Weh," Gunter said as he slid on his belly off of an ice ramp and into Ice King's thought bubble, bursting it.

"Oooh, you fwibbily penguin!" Another Gunter named Ginter slid in and handed the rotary phone with the extended cord to him. The very notion of someone calling him was exhilarating.

"Whaddya want?"

"Pardon, your majesty, this is Finn the Human calling on behalf of my dearest kin, Jake the Dog. I was hoping you could help me find him by sending out a group of your guards, whomever or whatever they may be... erm, to accompany with me-" Ice King's loud yawn interrupted him. "Yawn. I might as well tell you now that my henchme-" he cleared his throat. "-guards, I mean, will not be sent out. Mostly because I have Jake in my possession at the moment."

"Pardon?"

"Yawn again. He owed me taxes, though he neglected to register any taxable property in the first place."

"Stop saying yawn. You don't have to say the word, especially when you actually yawned. What are you gonna do to him?" His tone was not nice.

"Now, now, don't even think about raising your voice. Now, it depends on when he wakes up," said the Ice King, trying to keep from getting angry. His feels were starting to get hurt. Socializing often made him feel vulnerable.

"What are you going to do with him when he wakes up?" asked Finn.

"Now, unless you have the money to pay me back, which I doubt you do, he's mine to do with what I want," he giggled. He couldn't help but be tickled at the odds being tipped in his favor.

"Your majesty," he paused as he took a deep breath. "May I plead for amnesty?"

"Ahhh..." he did his best to think on his feet, "No, Jake is an adult and you are the dependent, so you cannot pay for his debt." Ice King reasoned.

"How much is the cost of this debt?" It sounded as if the boy was talking through his teeth. Hopefully he wasn't getting angry because Ice King wasn't in the mood for confrontation.

"Look just give up on him. He did something wrong, now he needs to be punished for his deed. As ruler of Ooo, I need financial compensation. Now, I'm the richest in all the land and unless you are me, you can't do anything except let it happen and move on."

"What? How could you- your majesty...I-I can't!" He began gasping. Boring. Off to better things to do. Time to bid farewell.

"Well, I don't care about your external, or internal problems. Goodbye!" he chirped. Hmm was that polite? Oh well.

* * *

Another stupid authority figure hanging up on Finn was really messing with him. Finn could care less about all the properties the King owned, or all the power that he had. Finn felt so furious. He redialed fifty-one, fifty.

"One crocodile, two crocodiles..." He made sure his exhales lasted twice as long as his inhales.

Okay, time to think. Chances are that no one at the factory had enough money. No one could help him. Finn looked around him. On the walls of the treehouse were weapons their father had used in battle. This was going to be nearly impossible. He never had to fight alone. Jake was always there to fight alongside him. Whenever he had an emergency, Jake would be the one he went to in a crisis. Who could he talk to now? His head started to pound. Whenever that would happen, Jake told him to shake the thoughts out of his head. His best friend was in trouble, so now it was time for him to stop thinking and to start doing.

Finn ran up to the bedroom. Fortunately, their dad taught him armed combat. Underneath his bed was a chest containing their dad's armor. Finn couldn't really use most of it, being much taller and stringy-er. But luckily the utility belt was adjustable, compact and removable. Their dad never needed to use the utility belt, seeing as how he was much better at hand-to-hand combat. He latched the belt onto his waist. The belt contained two vials, a thick, leather satchel of screws and metal gears, a silk satchel of copper and silver coins, one screwdriver, a pocket watch with a chain, and a pouch of batteries.

He opened the pocket watch, which also served as a locket. A picture of their mom was inside. His dad had it there to remind him of who he was fighting for, and who he had to survive for. Someone who was waiting for him. Finn rubbed his left eye. Totally not a cool time to cry.

"What are the batteries for?" he asked himself, thinking out loud. "The... flashlight? Yeah! But where's the flashlight?" He checked the chest. No flashlight. He tried looking underneath the bed. Man, it would be so much easier to look for the flashlight if Finn already had a flashlight. He opened the drawer next to his bed. "Ugh, so much useless junk," he complained. He pulled the compartment out and poured all of its contents onto the floorboards. He tossed the papers behind him. Nothing. He tried the second compartment, again dumping the things out. To his success, he found it! It looked so unbelievably complex, like he must have stolen it from a engineer or whatever. He tried to remember how he got it. His memories flickered in his mind. The night he saw the blue jewel in the starkness. The morning the pink girl told him to look in his drawer. It was the flashlight. But didn't those things happen in his dreams? He couldn't tell the difference between his dream world and the real world. They ran together like train rails, parallel to each other, propelling him in only one direction. But where was the destination? A flash of pain shocked his chest, but he had no time to deal with it; it was almost stark and who knew what would be in store for Jake when he woke up. He slid the flashlight through an empty slot in his belt, next to the pouch with batteries. He ran downstairs to the wall of weapons. Bows and arrows were good for long-range, but there was the risk of running out of arrows; same went for the poison darts and throwing stars. Besides, he didn't want to kill anyone; he just wanted to intimidate them. Above the fireplace, there were three swords lined up in a row: one bronze, one silver and one gold. Each bigger than the next. The gold was the biggest one, so that would do the trick. Finn reached up and lifted the gold sword off of the bolts on the wall.

"Woaaaaaaahh!" Finn exclaimed as he nearly fell back. His limbs wobbled, and his right hand had blood running from it. Because they were on display, they remained unsheathed. Even though the sword had grown rather dull over the years, even cracked on parts of the edges, it was still sharp enough to slice through all the layers of his skin. Now there was just a gushing, red gash that looked like his palm had a mouth. Not a good sign. He quickly crouched and laid the sword on the floor. He ran to the kitchen, opened the cupboard next to the sink and grabbed Jake's bandage box. He put it next to the sink as he quickly rinsed his open wound, wincing as the full-pressure water from the sink stabbed into wound. After he rinsed it for thirty seconds, he turned off the faucet and used gauze from the box to wrap around his injury. The blood was soaking through the gauze. If Jake or Mom were here, they'd stitch the wound, but they weren't and he didn't have time for it anyways. The yellow star was setting.

* * *

Jake's lids lifted up, filling his sight with light and shock. His fur was sticking out of his goosebumps. His head was unfrozen. He looked down to see that his body was still trapped in ice. He looked around to see himself in a room of ice crystals, ice furniture, ice blue. Then there was that ridiculous excuse of a king sitting on a throne of ice.

"Hello, Jake the dog. I am your king, and I want to present you with a choice. "

"Let me go!" Jake yelled.

"Now hold on, you haven't heard my ultimatum-er, my offers- yet-"

"You're a psychotic, old loser! Why should I listen to you?" he shouted, interrupting the Ice King.

"BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T, I'LL KILL YOU- I mean, I'm trying to look out for y-" The Ice King was interrupted by his chamber door slamming off of its ice hinges.

"Who are you and how dare you charge into my chamber?" Jake was facing the opposite wall and twisted his neck around to see Finn wielding Dad's golden sword.

"FINN! Oh how I've missed you!" Relief and happiness swelled in Jake's frozen chest and he couldn't help but smile.

"We've come to rescue Jake the Dog from underneath your tyranny and end the misery of The Icing Era!" Finn shouted at the Ice King. Jake replayed what he had just heard in his head. Ending the Icing Era would result in him killing the Ice King, which Jake was totally cool with. Good for him for teaching Finn the word "tyranny". So proud of him for using it correctly too. He said "we" but he said Jake's name afterward so he wasn't part of that "we", otherwise Jake would have to give Finn another grammar lesson on redundancy. Out of Jake's excitement, he had neglected to look beyond Finn. In the distance he saw a wardrobe. What was a wardrobe doing in the hallway facing directly in front of Ice King's chamber door? Then he realized some things about the wardrobe that signified that it wasn't Ice King's. Things so unbelievably insignificant, that they suddenly became so incredibly significant. The wardrobe wasn't blue, therefore it didn't match with anything else in the castle. The wardrobe was made out of wood. Wooden and pink. Pink. A product of red and white paint being mixed together. It was so unbelievably, incredibly, redundantly, pink.


	2. Author's Note

Don't forget to add me to your author alert subscription to get updates on new stories from the TARDIS book! Feel free to PM me any questions. Please, dear god, please review!


End file.
